FireLink

I hope he can relate to this. It may take him some time to get it.

Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family. The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion's guest room. Instead the angels were given a space in the cold basement.



As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it. When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied... "Things aren't always what they seem".



The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor, but very hospitable farmer and his wife. After sharing what little food they had the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good night's rest.


When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears. Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field.



The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel "how could you have let this happen!? The first man had everything, yet you helped him," he accused. "The second family had little but was willing to share everything, and you let their cow die."



"Things aren't always what they seem," the older angel replied. "When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the wall. Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn't find it. Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife. I gave him the cow instead. Things aren't always what they seem."



Sometimes this is exactly what happens when things don't turn out the way they should. If you have faith, you just need to trust that every outcome is always to your advantage. You might not know it until some time later.



Rom 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

I get the impression that your son is actually trying to deal with it.... he has thought about it and knows that there is a reason she was taken away and he is trying to cope with why she was taken so young... He Knows he will face the reality if he goes to the service but honestly i think he  has already come to that or else he wouldnt be reasoning with himself when it comes to attending.... i think you have a strong young man on your hands... i think that your support is all that he needs...just you being there is great.... Children are more percecptive then we think... My 7 yr old little girl called me last week and told me that her best friends mother had been killed in a car accident...she was also one of my 7 yr olds favorite teachers.... I ask my little girl if she understood what had happened.... I couldnt have felt more proud when she said.."Yes, it means that the lord has bigger plans for her...".... I asked her if she had talk to her friend... She said yes that she went and visited her....I asked her what she did while she was there..... My daughter said to me..."I Prayed for my friend and her family." I was not sure if my Daughter completely understood what had happened until... she told me that she knows what its like to loose someone very important to her and that she woud be there for her friend.... When my ex-husband went to get her from up stairs they were both sleeping soundly and My daughter was holding her friend.... I know it isnt the same situation but it is an example of how strong they are.... at 14 Your Son seems to be doing as good as could be expected even for an adult... I feel for you all in your time of need and I am praying for you all.... god bless...

Well, I'm 20 years old, but I'm going through the same thing right now. My friend Blake commited suicide a year and a half ago. His death was a complete shock because absolutely no one saw him doing that, yet he did. His family had a private funeral service, so nobody got to go. I, unlike your son, wanted to have the chance to say goodbye BECAUSE it makes it real. There was a big gaping hole in the grieving process for all of us because we never had the chance to say farewell. In May I lost my friend Chris and his girlfriend Kelly on the same night.  For the first month we had no idea why/how they died. I've tried to believe there is a reason for everything, but when I didn't know the reason they died it made it even harder. The final ruling was that they both overdosed. Talk about another shock?  Three weeks after that I lost my friend Tony, also because of an overdose. In between those events I moved across the country, and was unable to make it to that funeral. One again, not going made it not real for me. I know when I go back to Ohio it is really going to hit me, but until then I'm left to just deal with my feelings on my own. Just this week, my friend Mark passed away of unknown causes. They are investigating his death as a homicide, which just adds more questions and more pain to an already difficult situation. After losing 5 close friends in the last  year and a half the only thing I could say has kept me going is faith. I would encourage your son to attend the services because that is the only place he's really going to see the impact that his friend had an everyone. As sad as funerals are, it's an amazing feeling seeing who all your friend knows, how much everyone loved them, and what kind of legacy they're leaving behind. He's never going to have the chance to be around so many people who are experiencing the same thing as him, and doing so is going to help him start to heal a little bit. No one ever knows why God takes away young people who have a lot going for them, and the death of someone you love can make or break your faith. Your son should go, and it will be scary, but I know after he does he is going to feel better knowing there is a whole world of people out there who loved his friend as much as him. This kind of situation tends to pull people closer together, and it'd be a shame if he missed out on that. He may not find complete closure ever, but if he doesn't shut people out and make himself go through this alone he's going to find some sort of solace and peace of mind a little faster. Maybe I'm not the best person to give my opinion because death has sort of ruled my entire year, and I'm probably pretty emotionally screwed up myself right now, but I hope your son chooses to go say goodbye to his friend. I know that if he doesn't, somewhere down the road he'll wish he had. Let him know that he is in my prayers, as is your entire family and the family of the victim. God bless.

I agree dept24emt. But also be prepared to drop everything if he decides he wants to talk to you so he knows that is is important to you, and doesn't feel brushed aside.